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(I first drew this guy back in 2007, and again in 2010. So it seems appropriate to do another three-year upgrade. He was originally just a weird one-off character, but I thought he deserved a bit more development, so I decided to do play on his enthusiasm for potato products and make him a potato farmer. Yeah, a hyena who grows potatoes. Weird, huh? ;))
The Sternmeier family have been farming potatoes for as long as anyone can remember, carefully cultivating spuds that have become world famous for their firmness, rich and full-bodied flavor, high nutritional value, and distinctive purple hue.
There is, however, a special crop, which is a closely guarded secret, even within the Sternmeier clan. These potatoes contain a potent and mysterious magic, which often imposes unpredictable and dramatic effects upon the consumer. They are easy to distinguish from the standard Sternmeier crop, if you know what to look for. They have a brighter and fuller color. They sparkle and glow ever so faintly. They feel unusually warm to the touch, and some say they have even held one and felt it twitch in their hand. It is customary to give the oldest child their first magic potato no sooner than the age of fifteen, and only once they have agreed to continue the family business. Eating a dish made from these potatoes is considered a sacred rite of passage, and it is not something to be wolfed down carelessly.
Eugene, known to friends as “Star”, is the current head of the Sternmeier farm, and it’s not hard to tell that he’s a hyena who puts his money where his mouth is. Under his leadership, the Sternmeier name has expanded into hundreds of potato-related products, from French fries to hash browns, from salads to soups. Rumor has it that Star has even begun experimenting with vodka. If you’re looking for a taste of that elusive Sternmeier magic, however, you may be out of luck. Those “special” potatoes remain hidden and guarded tightly. Farmhands are forbidden to even mention their existence. But if you can get on Star’s good side (remember, he likes vodka), he might decide to indulge you in a little nibble of the private stock.
Remember: Self-replicating requires a lot of energy, so if you invite a friendly lava monster into your home for an orgy, make sure your pantry is well-stocked.
Best. Birthday. Ever.
Surrounded by attentive, sexy lavafoxes (and lavahorses and lavagiraffes)? What downside could there possibly be?
Birthday commission for Tazel
Shi came to me with a brilliant idea for a three-page comic wherein Kobi would use his lava-shifting powers to impel her to throes of sexual ecstasy via as many multiples of himself as he could fit into a semi-modern suburban dwelling with detached garage and swimming pool.
Now, I had scant experience drawing comics and crowd scenes, and I’d never drawn a multi-page comic before. But I loved the idea, and I immediately accepted the commission. “This’ll be easy!” I thought. “I can knock this out in a couple weeks, tops.”
ONE. YEAR. LATER.
When I say “This’ll be easy”, eleven times out of ten it means “God help me I have no idea what I’m doing somebody call an ambulance oh god why is there so much blood!?!” Let’s just say I quickly learned just how much I didn’t know I didn’t know about making comics.
But I learned a lot, and I got it done. And just in time for Tazel’s next birthday.
And I swear on my mother’s poorly-watered tomato plant’s grave, I will never take this long on a commission again.
One of the major advantage of being multicocked is that you never have to wait for the next round.